El Conde review

El Conde (2023)

Director: Pablo Larraín
Starring: Jaime Vadell, Gloria Münchmeyer, Alfredo Castro

Synopsis:

After living 250 years in this world, Augusto Pinochet, who is not dead but an aged vampire, decides to die once and for all.

Pinochet, after way too long on this earth, would really like to die now please. Outed as a vampire in the 18th century, he flees the country after an attempt on his life – and winds up in Chile. Renamed Augusto Pinochet, our man rises through the ranks to finally become the country’s dictator in 1973.

When the authorities catch up with him, with concerns about where his vast wealth has come from – and questions about all the heinous human rights violations he’s been responsible for – Pinochet fakes his death again and flees with his wife Lucia to a remote farmhouse.

Now Pinochet has lost his will to live and longs for the sweet kiss of death.

Living with the Pinochets is man butler Fyodor, a white Russian who was bitten by “The Count” and also turned into a vampire. One night he takes Pinochet’s uniform and goes out on a brutal killing spree. Eager to get their hands on their inheritance, and convinced that of course Pinochet was responsible for the murders (by way of being possessed by a demon), his children hire a nun called Carmen to exorcise and murder their father.

The nun, under the guise of showing up to audit the family’s wealth, easily charms Pinochet who’s just found out his wife is having an affair with his butler. This new attraction eventually comes to a head when the Pinochet decides to give Carmen a gift he’s held back from his wife. Oh, and then Maggie Thatcher shows up.

Will Pinochet lean into a new lease of life? Will Mrs P finally get her wish? And most importantly, will everyone just stop getting bit?

My thoughts

Stylistically, this film is a bit of me and I love the set up and idea. It starts gory which is always a plus but then, it just doesn’t quite hit the mark somehow. Maybe it’s the extended discussion about inheritance, property and bank accounts that hurts it when really I’d like to know more about the war crimes or focus on the action at hand in the present.

There are moments of amusement, some snappy dialogue (usually from Carmen) and again it hits the spot aesthetically, I just wanted a bit more.

My rating

3 out of 5

Find out what Jill thinks here.